| My Pancha Karma Experience |
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| Written by Lloyd Barde |
| Thursday, 07 May 2009 03:39 |
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Appeared in Ayurveda Newsletter Fall 2008
by Lloyd Barde
During this time I kept a careful daily log, from tongue scraping observation to bowel movements, and from a detailed food log to any noticeable feelings. And my energy level was severely dropping. By the end of week two, the daily walk I had been taking for the past few months was reduced by half, then by 75%, and then became the challenge of simply walking out the front door! Though it had been suggested that “I may not really understand the meaning of the word debilitated,” which was apparently true, I was certainly finding out. Everything in my life, starting with me, was slowing way down. Just sitting was enough of a challenge. After the pre-cleanse began six days of body sessions, which were a heavenly and opening experience. At three hours or longer, each one was an inner journey of cleansing, releasing, deepening the connection to self, and working through the layers of the body’s defenses, stored patterns, and forgotten pains. We went through Abhyanga (a two-person synchronized oil massage), Nasya (clears the nasal passages), and Swedana (individual herbalized sweat therapy). I learned about Shirodhara, in which the flow of warm oil falls gently on the third eye while in a prone position, following deep bodywork strokes that open everything from the inside. For me, this particular position was truly challenging, since my head was tilted back and lower than the rest of my body. This, due to long-standing claustrophobia, a sensitive inner ear, and a sense of vertigo that led to near panic attacks, caused great alarm in me. This was odd since the whole experience is ultimately so relaxing. When I mentioned this to Jen, she remarked “I wish you had told me about this; we will need to find a way to work around this…”. My response, due to the deep trust and 110% commitment, was “I actually feel that we will be able to work through it, and I will be OK in doing so”. This was a big step, and I can honestly say that this phobia was cleared and is no longer an issue. How could I deny the bliss that was being offered on the way to a new life awareness? Other body therapies were included, highlighted by Netra Basti, an “eyebath,” which would have driven me out of my skin previously. Instead, it was totally blissful, albeit a bit strange, as my eyes ‘drank” the warm solution of ghee and herbs in warm water. Amazing. And there was more. While I was frequently an unctuous pool of sweet-smelling oil, I was surely a very peaceful and thoroughly relaxed one. Then a day’s fast, which was also well received. By then I was acutely aware of everything everywhere, and relished the slowness and heightened sensitivity. My system was so cleaned out there was no need for food, so fasting was right in step. Next was a series of enemas, very gentle & not “immediate” but held and released at the proper time. Feelings encountered along the way ranged, from a new realm of blissful experiences to feelings of impatience and being unnerved. Issues of self-worth and insecurity arose, along with sadness, aloneness and self-sufficiency. All were met with openness and inquiry, and were given the space to be felt and released when the time was right. Rejuvenation began after that, and it was a slow and gradual rebuilding of strength and nourishing activity. It was at this point that I started to notice what was so thorough about this Pancha Karma experience. My priorities had completely changed and been rearranged. Nothing was more important than my morning regimen now. And this meant not getting out of the house for two and a half hours after getting up, and getting up much earlier than I had been used to. Meditation, a walk or hike, preparing my food, tongue scraping, stomach massage, yoga routine and breathing (Pranayama) … and then I was ready to bring myself fully into the day. In the fifth week I returned to work at a reduced schedule, kept closely in touch with Jen, and was literally broadcasting health and wellbeing without saying a word. I felt clear, calm and steady. And the next aspect of how thorough this cleanse was began showing up, in the form of dropping attachments. This was big, and allowed further flow to enter my life, at home, at work, or in contact with others. I could listen better, understand more clearly, and was not anywhere near as “hooked” as I had been prior to this time. Friends would say ‘whatever you’ve got I want some!” And others just fixated on the weight loss and appearance of my “new” body. To me, that was the least of it. The thoroughness of the changes continues over a year later, as I now have a deepening spiritual practice, and my system is clean and clear, such that if I eat something less healthy it is pretty much gone the next morning. And I can look others and myself in the eye and know I am taking care of myself and being available to offer, in service, whatever I am able to them as well. The Pancha Karma changed my life, and it is, for me, something that will continue everyday to the best of my ability with the same commitment that I brought to that very “first day”. |
